Sunday, August 23, 2009

The Cow Says...

On Friday, K spontaneously suggested that we go to the zoo on Saturday...kind of a "last huzzah" before both kids go to school. So off we went yesterday. We went early so that we could go through the childrens' area for free. Turns out that we found free parking as well. And since the zoo itself is free, we were already ahead of the game! Basically, this just meant we could spend more money on other things throughout the day.

Tremendous fun was had by all. But, more importantly, I noticed a few things about the zoo that struck me, and I shall share them with you, the lucky lucky reader of my drivel.

1. Wearing high heels to the zoo is pointless. Seriously. You're not doing yourself any favors, and I doubt you're going to find a date at the zoo, if that's your intent. I guess one of the lions might be looking for some action, but they don't really care about footwear.

2. I've come to the realization that you could make a game show category called "Zoo Animal Sound or Random Baby Sound?" The two sounds are almost indistinguishable at times.

3. If you are a giant-ass ostrich, and you try to eat a 1-foot-long feather but end up choking on it, do not try to eat the same feather (and continue to choke on it) for the next 15 minutes. That is why you are in the cage and we are watching and laughing at you.

4. Stingrays feel like wet pancakes.

5. Seeing seeing animals that are actually, officially called "Someli Asses" is just awesome. If you say "Someli" fast enough, it's even funnier.

6. People who try to feed napkins to giraffes should probably be contained in zoo cages labeled "complete morons".

And now I must steel myself for a nice, long run around the park. I was out of town and didn't watch whatever Syfy had to offer this week, but you can bet your Someli Ass that I will be watching next week. Syfy has promised to offer up "Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus"!! I am in no way missing that.

that's nobody's business but the Turks

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