Thursday, May 29, 2008
When I started my current job I felt completely out of place. I was a circle amidst a crowd of squares, searching for a circle like me. These days I feel like some circle/square hybrid. I don't seem to fit in with the circles or the squares. I like most of my coworkers about as much as anyone can truly "like" a coworker. I get along with all of them and some I find infinitely amusing. But none of them would be people I'd hang out with or invite over for a discussion about Nietzche over dinner. Okay, I don't think I'd even be able to carry on that discussion for very long. But I digress.
Work I can deal with. Work is work. Most conversations don't pass beyond that oh-so-familiar "how's it going?" barrier. I'm easy-going and can get along with most anyone so whether others feel I don't fit in is undetermined. No, work is fine. But my friends are another issue entirely.
See, I don't really see any of my friends regularly. Of the two groups of friends I have, I see people from group A maybe once every six months. The other group I tend to see most of them once a week for lunch...for, like, an hour. There are issues there that I will not bore you with. Suffice it to say "pulling teeth" or "trying to get elephants to mate" are good descriptors.
So, because of all this, I don't really feel I fit in with any of them much anymore. Sure, we share some of the same hobbies or interests but only on a fundamentally shallow level. And because I don't interact much with them beyond the e-mail paradigm I get used to not being with them in person. I find that I have almost no desire to do this anymore. Part of me is saddened and then the other part is "meh".
See, my childhood was much like that of an only child. I have a sister but we didn't really do that much in the way of playing as siblings. And, due to several moves, I couldn't really get friend connections to grow very easily. Though I still remember my first real friend in kindergarten. I went up to a random boy and said "Hey, would you be my friend?" He said "yes" and we were inseparable...well, until I moved again. Thank you, Donald. I still consider you a friend wherever you are. Tell your brother to stop shooting toy guns at us.
And just recently I have learned an important lesson. You can determine the measure of a friend very easily. True friends respond with concern when you tell them to go to Hell. The others all simply say "no, you".
But I know I fit in at least one place--my family. They put up with me and even love me. I can't ask for more than that. And, for now, that's enough for me--I'm fine with that. I'm sure the rest will all fall into place eventually.
Maa aaa aaaaps
Saturday, May 24, 2008
For those who are interested, I posted a short piece (~550 words) in my Writing.com portfolio about jumping out of an airplane. It's here. It is not intended to be a masterful composition of awesomeness. I have not revisited to edit it, so there may be boo boo's. So you get what you pay for.
Then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel is just a freight train coming your way...
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Last night, G graduated from preschool. The service was quite nice, replete with slideshow at the beginning set to about 15 different renditions of "Canon". It was at this time that my crabby, curmudgeony eyes squeezed out a little bit of some viscous liquid. There were quite a few pictures of G but it was the first one that got me--her at the top of a slide. I don't know why. Hey, shut up. I'm allowed, aren't I?
I think part of it is that, at that moment, I just realized that there were parts of my daughter's life that did not include me. While kindergarten looms next year and seems like a big step, I realize that preschool was really the first big step--the first time that she's gone off without her Daddy. It's really only symbolic, but once it starts it only gets more prevalent. It starts at preschool and then moves onto more school. Then college. Then, before I know it, she won't let me into the White House because I'm a "shady character." I don't blame her. I wouldn't let me into the White House either.
I went to Montessori when I was a little squirt. I remember many things about it: sandcastles built to the sky, sitting around a circle of red tape, graham crackers and OJ for snack. But I do not remember ever having a graduation. Maybe I skipped out on it, instead choosing to go smoke with the cool goth kids.
Anyway, G, here's to you. Congratulations! Before you (and I) know it, you'll be graduating high school. I can't wait for that, but let's not rush into things, ok?
On a related note, we had a nice little graduation party with the grandparents. We ordered pizza and ate ice cream. K made cupcakes (and a bigger cake) with frosting pink enough to burn holes in your retinas. It was all very yummy.
Two dogs and one cat agree. I'm not sure when we'll learn not to leave food out on the table and them leave the pets alone with it but I suspect it'll be sometime after we're long dead. Thankfully there were not little blobs of pink barf on the rug this morning, unless they vomited discreetly and hid it from me. I know this to be an untruth since our pets all seem very proud of their end product when they yark on the floor. They'd probably wake me up and drag me out to show me if they could.
I see it coming like a wave of orange juice.
Monday, May 19, 2008
That's what G told me on Sunday. I have a rash on my chest that itches. I scratched it so, voila, I have leprosy! Much laughter was had. I beg of you, dear reader, can you spare a nickel for a leper?
As think as I confused I am
Friday, May 16, 2008
The Machine Shed
Random Facts of Baconosity:
So, what does one find in the store at the Machine Shed? Gentlemen, behold!
Bask in the glory of all that is GUMMY BACON! Let's observe a few important things here:
- "Gummi" is spelled incorrectly. Typical.
- It is strawberry flavored (you can't tell from the glare).
- Take note of the all-important "Bacon viewing window"...it's important for, uh, some reason, I'm sure.
- The back panel provides important safe handling instructions such as, "keep in cool dry place away from sunlight" and "do not attempt to fry or microwave"! I can only assume that sunlight causes gummy bacon to reach sentient levels a la Skynet from the Terminator movies.
- The sock monkey...no real importance except that sock monkeys are cool. This one's about 3 1/2 inches tall.
Racked up like a deuce, another roller in the night
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Thursday, May 8, 2008
I just read an article online about how the penny and the nickel now cost more money than they're worth. The nickel costs something like 7.5¢ to produce and it costs 2¢ to produce each penny because of the metals that are in them. Pennies are annoyances to begin with so why even line them with our oh-so tasty and precious copper? What's even funnier is that the nickel has more copper in it than the penny.
Pennies are rather worthless. Nobody wants them. I think the best way to utilize the penny is this: We should drop them on military targets that we wish to bomb. Surely enough pennies dropped from a few miles up would do some heinous damage, right? And what better way to help the people of said country than to throw money at them? So we destroy the military target and provide laundry money for the inhabitants. And we get rid of our stupid, unwanted pennies at the same time! Hmm hmm hmm...I am a genius. :P
Maybe we just need a good alien invasion--not necessarily to force us to develop new technologies. Nope. I think it'd be much easier just to steal theirs. Isn't that how it works? We sneeze, they all die from the germs, then we salvage their stuff. Simple, that. Someone needs to get to work on this. d:()' <--that's a monkey wearing a baseball cap, smoking a cigarette.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
As I've said before, I originally intended Holding the Wall to be a standalone piece but people were interested in the outcome. I wasn't really concerned with anything but Damiel's situation. But I hope I've adequately answered said queries with the series of three.
No idea what I am going to write next. I've got a couple of ideas floating around in my head and there are a couple of already written stories I can drudge up and revamp. I'll see how the mood strikes me.
What's funny is the name of the senator who's moving the bill through the Senate. Senator Doug Stoner!!! Ha ha.
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Monday, May 5, 2008
I started a garden this weekend--so much as three tomato plants, three pepper plants, and a strawberry plant can actually be considered a garden. I lined them up against the fence at the back of the yard and threw some mulch over them. It's my little experiment to see how well they grow. If they die, well, I'm only out $1.49/plant. If I get two peppers or two tomatoes from each plant then I made my money back. Well, okay, one of the tomato plants is a cherry tomato plant...so I'd better damn well get more than two.
If the "garden" succeeds I will probably line the whole fence with plants. Why buy it when you can grow your own? There's not a whole lot of maintenance except some water and tying the tomatoes to the fence when they get too tall. By trade I am not a plant nurturing person, but I think I can handle that.
Every so often I come to realize that I have a lot of junk. I mean a lot of junk. I'd say about 50% of it is toys. I like toys. I don't really buy them anymore except for an occasional Halo 3 action figure. But I've collected quite a few over the years, with Star Wars being the most plentiful. So every once in a while I try to find ways to reduce clutter without reducing the toys themselves. I have a lot of action figures on display in the basement and in my office which, while fun, gets to looking cluttered if I have too many.
Sometimes I feel that the toys themselves are unhappy with their plight. Like they're going to get all Gulliver's Travels on me and I'm going to awaken, tied to the floor, while they poke me with their little pointy things and guns, demanding more real estate.
Inevitably I throw out other things like computer books that only apply to any technology made previous to the last 10 years (and, yes, I recycle them). That helps, but then the space just seems to get swallowed up by something else that comes out of storage or whatnot. Maybe I should let my daughters loose and throw out whatever they manage to break. That would probably cut down greatly on the clutter.
On a completely unrelated note, I saw Iron Man this weekend. Really good flick. I like it when someone actually gets it right.